I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
I just made out with a guy for $7.
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
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