If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
Randomize
