He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
This milkshake tastes better than sex. Priorities, I have them.
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
Do you remember me making bird noises at the bartender with some guy at the bar last night?
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
I'm going to write a new song and call it "Did I wax my vagina for this?" remind me to never go across the country for a penis ever again.
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
Randomize