we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
She showed up at 4:30 in the morning HAMMERED, stripped, demanded sex, then after 4 failed attempts stopped me mid-thrust to tell me she thought we should be fucking for a cause, like animal rights. Process that for a second. She wanted us to be fucking for animal rights.
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
Randomize
