she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
In sex ed. they really need to include a lesson on saying tampon in foreign languages, just in case.... Trying to ask the woman at the reception desk, who barely speaks English, for one just turned into an awkward game of charades.
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
So he cheated on his gf again. For the third time. Second time with me. HE CRIED WHILE DRIVING ME HOME BECAUSE HE CHEATED ON HER. And I laughed the entire way. Good god I'm an asshole.
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
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