there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
I just took a service station dump so foul I had to buy gas out of guilt
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
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