please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
Randomize
