Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
She left me with blue balls so I jerked off on her french toast in the morning.
I told her I was team Edward. I haven't gotten laid that easy since I told your sister that I had cancer
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
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