I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
I woke up with my face covered in mustard. Your mom said I ate hotdogs like a pornstar
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
