It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
Something about getting whistled at in my work clothes while crossing the street with three Nuvarings in my back pocket feels wrong.
They want yo temporarily sterile ass.
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
Damn victory sex feels great
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
Randomize
