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I like my sex mixed with concussions.
My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
Randomize
