You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
Also, my phone autocorrects ENABLER to all caps. I think I drunk text the word too often.
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
Hurricane my ass. I'm riding a god damn kayak down the flooded highway if it's the last god damn thing I do, god damnit.
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
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