you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
And since we used to fuck you are absolutely obligated to like my tweets
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
Randomize
