just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
Bottom line; if I'm coming out of my bat cave to do the dishes and get a chicken wing and I have no pants or makeup on and my messy bun looks more like Santa got leprosy and crashed his sled into the back of my head then let me be. That's all I'm saying.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
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