Awkward is getting caught beating off in the company bathroom...
Everytime she opens her mouth it's like a fucking terrorist attack on my life.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
My boss just gave me full permission to come into work wasted this weekend.
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
One good thing about being a mom now, I can tell which guys I'm dating were breastfed and which weren't... By the way they latch on to my breast during sex! Kinda kills the mood.
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
I don’t care if there’s a pandemic. My husband gave me a hall pass for my 40th birthday and I’m going to use it!
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