Last-second stop at the drug store for lube and condoms. Clerk said "So uhmmm...that's a done deal, huh?"
High five!
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
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