hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
Who knew that being in a committed relationship is the same thing as forced celibacy? Did not sign up for this.
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
I've never used poorer judgment in my life. It's mathematically possible that I impregnated 5 women in the past 24 hours since I won the lottery. But I couldn't be happier about it.
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
She's not a foreskin expert like you
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
Randomize
