dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
Randomize
