I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
I just found glitter from our Father's Day party on my balls this morning.
DAD WTF
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
Randomize
