new low, i just stole money from my 5 year old sister to buy condoms
I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
He said "I can't wait for you to feel me inside of you so I can tell you gently that you're mine" and left me a 4 minute voice mail of him crying after I told him I didn't want to be with him. 30 year olds are off limits.
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
