How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
how do you casually eat pancakes with someone after they send you an unsolicited dick pic?
you don't. it's the point of no return for pancake enjoyment.
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
Randomize
