dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
The bank teller laughed at me....I'm apparently that fucking hungover looking
All I wanted was my $85. Judgement free. But nooooo
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
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