his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
Randomize
