whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
It's like the blind leading the senile over here.
UPDATE: shit just got real- grandma is threatening to beat grandpa with a wooden spoon covered in chili.
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
Just taking a shit and realized the captain planet theme song is stuck in my head.
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
You poured 151 in your eye, ran face first into a tree, fell down, then threw a lawn chair at the dog...all before passing out in the hallway and pissing yourself. There is no way to redeem yourself.
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
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