hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
Is her dick bigger than yours?
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
Randomize
