It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
no you cant smoke seaweed
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
