i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
Your subconscious sucks. Mine is awesome. I have a recurring dream where I manage a chocolate factory run by big titted hookers.
A) you're a liar. B) that would be awesome.
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
My Tinder date from last night is my Uber driver for tonight's Tinder date...neither of us said a word.
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
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