This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
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