Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
If I was doing exactly what I wanted right now I would be getting fucked on a jet ski while listening to "When Love Takes Over" by Kelly Rowland while eating french fries.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
I'm still drunk, my mom is throwing up, and there is a random Irish guy out getting our house breakfast right now. Wednesday's are my bitch.
Randomize
