Did you just see the Batmobile???
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
He stumbled in drunk at 7am, while we were getting ready for work. He poured a bowl of Cap'n Crunch, poured Jack Daniels on it., and said he was having "Captain Jack" for breakfast. I don't know how he's alive and employed. I hope the Cap'n calls in sick for him today.
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
Randomize
