You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
In line at the grocery store. The girl ahead of me is in a wetsuit and just bought 3 cases of beer and a bottle of vodka. I want to go where she's going...
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
Randomize
