They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
Mistake of the day: loudly discussing my gay hookups on the phone at the dmv in upstate NY... this must be what leprosy feels like
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
Dude, I came home and you were passed out halfway through the front door in your Minnie Mouse outfit... with a beer still in hand
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
Randomize
