Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
She told me to "stuff her hole like a build-a-bear". I was so drunk I didn't even think that was weird.
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
Randomize
