Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
He just brought me a wine glass. Full of Tequila. Ignore any texts after this one.
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
this is getting really bad. i thought the chandelier in the dining room was one of those claws from the claw games in an arcade and i spent the past five minutes jumping left to right so the claw wouldn't grab me
But theres a keg here and me gusta
A drunk hobo just gave me a fist bump. Because I know what a womb is.
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
Randomize
