i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
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