Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
apparently red wine has the total opposite effect that whiskey does on his dick
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
Side note: the physics of a guy my size and age getting laid in the backseat of a Toyota Camry are absolutely staggering
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
Randomize
