Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
You slow danced with your carpet steamer last night.
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
You pole danced in your parka.
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
if elf comes on TV one more time i swear to god i will smash my brains out with this fruitcake
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
Randomize
