dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
Bagel with cream cheese. It's blowing my fucking mind.
How high are you right now..
I MICROWAVED IT. SIGNIFICANT IMPROVEMENT.
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
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