I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
Hey.... can you explain to me why when I woke up this morning my cell phone background had been changed to me getting a piggy back ride from a drag queen?
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
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