Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
The kids I taught this morning even knew i was drunk. One of them even said, and I quote, "You smell like my dad after he goes bowling."
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
Randomize
