didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
I've taken a shot every five minutes for the past twenty. His valentines cupcakes are going to be a fucking delicious vodka induced mess. Thinking about putting vodka in this next batch. I'm the best girlfriend.
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
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