Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
Uhm... Found a ziploc bag... In the freezer. Sam, thought it was lemonade. Why did you make frozen piss at my house, again?
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize
