I just made out with a guy for $7.
If penises could fly, my ass would totally be an airport.
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
Randomize
