I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
His Instagram is like a gay porn blog all of the sudden got conquered by the Mormon missionary that he is
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
I think it's time for tequila and I to go our separate ways
Randomize
