I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize
