Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
We went to the police station completely hammered looking for you. Don't tell me I'm not a good friend.
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
My dad sent me a 10 ft beer bong and my mom sent me ideas for future careers. I'll let you guess who my favorite parent is. Also, come over tonight. and bring beers.
I have no idea why my husband is mad that I came home at 4 am & all I want to do is eat spaghettios. It's not fucking spaghettios fault.
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
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