Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
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