idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
I just slapped my cat in the face with my dildo. You were the only one I could tell.
He probs deserved it.
Every good man does.
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
Randomize
