that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
NEWSFLASH - my freind is drunk and admitted that he hates having sex with dogs. should i help him or let him be??
He also left me a wonderful voice mail..... and is now asking me where the planters peanut guy is.
You should probably go find him.
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
Randomize
