she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
You're breaking my sexual little heart
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Randomize
